I was flipping through chanels yesterday and happened to catch the last 10 minutes of Juno.

Juno was in the hospital giving birth.

Jennifer Garner saw her baby boy and held him for the first time.

Juno’s boyfriend came to the hospital and they lay in bed together and cried.

Jennifer Garner took her son home….

And in the nursery was the framed note: “If you’re still in…..I’m still in” Juno

And I sobbed like a baby…. by myself… in my room.

I remember it all like it was yesterday and I am still in awe of the miracles.

Love much,

xob

PS.  Helpusadopt.org Road Trip Blog 2010 starts tomorrow!

Infertile Blondes RULE!!!

And so do Infertile Brunettes, Infertile Reds and whatever you may be.

But today’s post is about a new IFB friend of mine in OHIO.

We’ve never met.

But we’re connected…..in so many ways.

And she asked “how can I help Helpusadopt.org?”

She (and her best/snack closet friend) happen to love and wear the Helpusaodpt.org bracelet (see it on www.helpusadopt.org)…

So I suggested this…..

The average grant that Helpusadopt.org makes is $7,500.  If you sell 215 bracelets @$35 each you will effectively build ONE family through adoption…..

And she loved the idea.

She’s up for the challenge and is hard at work to meet her goal by December 1st!

Post your comments and cheer her on….

I know she’s going to do it….and knowing her she won’t stop at 215!

Go get ‘em blondie….

And if anyone else feels up to the challenge….just let me know.

We’ve got plenty of bracelets to go around…..

I’m wearing 9 today!

Love much,

xob

www.helpusadopt.org

Dear friends of mine whose birthmother was due in two weeks just recently told me that it’s over.

The birthmother is gone…….and not because she decided to parent.

It’s devastating…..For many reasons.

But the reason that upsets me the most (as a friend, adoptive parent and adoption advocate)  is that the birthmother was dealing with another agency behind my friend’s back and went with this other agency because they offered more support money.

Bottom line.

How can this be?

How can the system that we as adoptive parents have to put our trust in fail us like this?

As an adoptive parent, this is the stuff that makes me heavy hearted about the adoption process and the system in general—and yes I do understand that situations like this are the exception to the rule, but who wants to tell my friends that right now?

I know from comments I receive on An Infertile Blonde that some feel that Adoptive Parents are “buying babies” when they adopt…..and if this is how you think then what do you think in a case like this when the birthmother is clearly “selling” her baby to the highest bidder?

These are the issues that many don’t want to talk about….

Because these issues are ugly, dark and raise many questions about the adoption process….

But to pretend they don’t exist….

To pretend that the system doesn’t need to be changed…..

To say that “this is just how it is”….

To look the other way and move on…

Well that in my book is just not right.

Maybe the other agency didn’t know the birthmother in question was already matched? But if that is the case where are the checks and balances within the system to make sure these kind of things don’t happen?

I wonder if there could be some kind of confidential birth mother registry that agencies or lawyers could cross check….hmmmmm…I’ll add that to my to do list.

Be well my friends……you are in my heart…..

Love much,

xob

I don’t know about you but I am a bit of a bag addict…..

OK I am a total bag addict.

For my lifestyle I especially love totes….I throw my entire life into them….

A book to read on the bus or subway, a towel and suntan lotion for the beach, or sand toys for The Boy to use at The Central Park playground he loves.

I even use them for a quick trip to the grocery store—even An Infertile Blonde can be green sometimes.

So after much searching (you have no idea) for the perfect tote for Helpusadopt.org I finally found it and they’ll be here any day!

It’s hip, it goes with everything, it’s the perfect size and best of all?????

THIS BAG HELPS TO BUILD FAMILIES THROUGH ADOPTION!

Want one?

$20 each + $5 s&h

Please send a check made out to Helpusadopt.org to:

Helpusaodpt.org / TOTE BAG

PO Box 20435

New York, NY 10021

OR  make a $25 donation onine via pay pal at www.helpusadopt.org PLEASE PUT TOTE BAG in Special Instructions section.

Love much,

xob

“The Inferitle Blonde”

1/3 Absolut Vanilla Vokda (no substitutions)*

1/3 Pineapple Juice

1/3 Club Soda (for some sparkle)

Serve chilled over ice

*Depending on where you are in your IVF treatments or adoption process, may increase Vodka to 2/3+ as needed.

Enjoy!

And a BIG thank you to my dear friend M for introducing me to this delicious drink…….

Love much,

xob

www.helpusadopt.org

Survived the 8 and 10 hour flights with The Boy and The Girl (they were amazing)

Realized that my Italian isn’t what it used to be when I ordered bread instead of pasta for THE BOY (Penne vs. Pane)

Brought a book on vacation that I already read but it was amazing so I read it again:  Keeping Faith by Jodi Picoult (highly recommend)

Let THE BOY go into EVERY souvenir store in ROME so he could buy his “prizes” as he called them

Ate my weight in mozzarella…..

Hung out in Piazza Navona with the kids late at night

Sat on the Spanish Steps with my babies

Posed with Gladiators at the Colosseum

Ate my weight in gelato…….

Threw coins in the Trevi Fountain

Went to the Rome Zoo

Swam in the Mediterranean Ocean

Had the family vacation I’d always dreamed of

And relaxed……something I haven’t done in months

The kids were amazing travelers and I would do it again in a heartbeat…..but The Girl is crawling like a madwoman and doesn’t want to sit still, can you blame her?

Can’t imagine I’ll be on another 10 hour plane ride anytime soon….

But it was fabulous!

Love much,

Xob

www.helpusaodpt.org

Months ago, when K asked me what I wanted to do for my 40th birthday the answer was out of my mouth before he finished asking the question.

A family vacation.

And not just any family vacation.

I wanted to take the kids to our favorite city in the world (next to NYC)….

Rome, Italy.

I know….I know …..who in their right mind would want to travel abroad with a 4 1/2 year old and a 7 month old…..the flights alone are going to be challenging enough!

Every time I tell someone we’re taking the kids they sort of look at me as if to say “do you know what you are doing?”

And I do.

I know exactly what I am doing.

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Before I had chidlren I traveled the world with K…..

And now I don’t want to travel without them….and I won’t travel without them.

The funny thing is that not only do I want to bring them with us……I made promises to their birthmothers that they would travel the world.

And I take my birthmother promises quite seriously.

We’ve got our passports…..

We’re not really packed….

And poor Miss Bitz isn’t coming.

The Boy can’t wait…..and The Girl?

Well, The Girl will see the pictures someday….

And you will too.

I’ll post some when I get back!

Love much,

xob

The Boy’s travel tent was one of my smarter “kid gear” purchases….

Not only is it incredibly useful when we travel…

It provides hours of entertainment when we are home.

However…….

SOMEONE has decided that it’s her dog bed.

Love much,

xob

As you know I belong to a very exclusive book club of two…..

Earlier this week my book club friend emailed me that she just finished Tori Spelling’s new book….

And I couldn’t wait for her to ship it to me…..

So yesterday when I was in the suburbs at Target (one of my favorite stores EVER) ….I bought it.

Love her or hate her (I actually love her and have actually seen her in person in NYC) Tori Spelling is intriguing to many.

After my Target trip, I arrived early at my first meeting of the day and brought my book inside the coffee place to get started.

The book sat on my table as I checked my email first and would you believe that three women stopped me to ask “Is it good? Have you started it yet? Did you read the others?”

I couldn’t believe it.

So last night, since I was in Philadelphia by myself (kids, dog and husband stayed in NYC) I had the luxury to lie in bed and read.

All I can say is  Uncharted TerriTORI is all I expected it to be….and yes I’ve read the others.

A good entertaining read about a working (ok famous) mom who just wants to have it all…..

Can you blame her?

Love much,

xob

“My adoption is going to cost more than my take home pay is in a year.” Helpusadopt.org grant recipient: Erica, Indiana.

Erica is not alone.

This is a child welfare issue that has worldwide impact.

Helpusadopt.org is working towards a solution.

Who wants to help?

Love much,

xob